…more beneficial people start arriving into my world
(I’m welcoming them also into my world, of course I’ll keep the old ones but I would want new people to add new colors into my world, hopefully they would also welcome me into their world that’s new for me)…diminishing at last through the famous healing power of time, patience and the grace of God
(this is what I wanted to do with my guilt, wrong decisions, wrong relationships, the could have beens, the what ifs, all the mistakes, every ill thoughts, every accusations, all the things that makes my heart weary)…to sit in my own company
(for the longest time I haven’t done this, to just sit and be still….I can’t do it anymore, my mind is wandering whenever I try to be with my own company)…my one mighty travel talent is that I can make friends with anybody
(just thought this is very me!)…to put as many continents and oceans as possible between me and this guy, in the hope of finding peace and happiness
(not for public consumption =P)…the health of the planet is affected by the health of every individual in it
(happy people, happy earth…one day!)…strange interior gesture of friendship – the lending of a hand from me to myself when nobody else is around to offer solace
(I need to go back to my best friend’s bosom, haven’t been spending much time with her lately, I need to talk to myself more, she’s my best friend after all)…the insecurity about whether we have earned over happiness
(a long time ago I’m guilty of this, whenever I’m happy I’m questioning myself whether I deserved this, but I was set free already…I have all the reason to be happy, just being happy, no more working for it but just choosing to be happy)…there’s a constant level of closeness that I really need from the person I love. And it just destroys me to count on that affection when I need it
(this is my selfish side, and it’s sad that I’m not getting the care or love I needed whenever I want it, the way I want it but it’s good that I always look on the bright side of things..the positive, not all the time though but I can always bounce back)
…beauty attracts beauty
(need I explain, when you’re attracted to me then we are beautiful…hahaha deep thought ha!)…I can go wherever I want
(I just love being free, from the inside to the outside)…you gotta let go and sit still and allow contentment to come to you
(yes, I will!)…you have no idea how strong my love is
(exactly what I want to say!)…the only thing between me and God was…NOTHING
(correct! Absolutely correct)…God lives within you
(and so is with you)…approach all hardships and discomforts with a shining face and a giant smile
(I wish I can always do this…a sunny disposition despite raging storms)…the hardest part of your life is behind you now
(thank God!!!!)…diligent joy
(you cultivate it, you nourish it)…I would want to be the happiest human you’ve ever encountered
(wishin and hopin)…to lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balance life
(hmmmmmmmmm I beg to disagree)…fear! who cares? and I disembarked alone
(brave girl, take risk)…the quietest place I’ve ever been
(it’s not a place perse, it’s a state, of being at peace)…I was empty. Nothing was fighting in my mind anymore
(there! That’s where I want to be!)…I was not rescued by a prince, I was the administrator of my own rescue
(help yourself, nobody to count on!)...I become a student of my own depressed experience trying to unthread its causes
(whenever I feel sad, I just let myself go through it for as long as I gave it a deadline…then after that I would analyze the reason for being sad and hopefully try to learn from the experience and figure out a way not be that sad again….i guess I’m learning my lesson well coz I’m opening a lot of opportunities whenever I get to this state, I’m becoming a student of my own self…memorizing me, scrutinizing me, putting off those buttons that shouldn’t be put on)…in this most private notebook, is where I talk to myself
(aha!!!)…when I get lonely these days, I think: so be lonely
(exactly what I tell myself…but set a deadline)…me la cavo – I can get by
(as always!)…there is a theory that if you yearn sincerely enough the universe will shift molecules will get themselves organized
(same as my favorite line from The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”)…control your thoughts!
(yup, you should command yourself to do this, be very vigilant…for it is also written in the Bible “as a man thinketh so is he”)Ako, 25 October 2010
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